Ohhh NUTS

So there are little lessons i learn on an almost weekly basis. Alot of them are things i wish someone had told me... Mostly regarding my children, sometimes my husband, but i think i will start blogging about my hard earned wisdom so that maybe you can steer clear.
When i was a very little girl i remember that my great grandparents always had a bowl of mixed nuts with the shells on them. I hated nuts as a child so i was never interested in them. This last shopping trip i passed a large bin of shelled nuts and thought Aidan would love them. They're a completely healthy snack and a fun project. On top of that i envisioned myself cuddled up with a good book on the couch on a cold winters eve cracking nuts....( i know so never gonna happen nuts or not) but hey you can't shovel if ya have to crack... SO i buy ALOT... Like bags full... and the cracker thingy...
I get home set up my cute bowl of nuts and precede to crack one.... Not only is it hard but they are dangerous weapons of mass destruction! They shoot allllll over the room... maybe there is a secret to it that i don't get but my goodness! So aidan insisted on trying it as well and at that point there were shells from one end of the house to the other so i let him at 'em... I really believe i will never be done cleaning up walnut shells! Not to mention kendi ate as many shells as nuts so its a good possibility the next diaper will be all shelly... and super fun!
Moral: Stick to de-shelled nuts!

Preterm labor

Amelia the youngest surviving premature baby to date. She was born at 21 weeks. She is developmentally normal for her age. To date she is 2 1/2 years old.

Amelia's feet at birth.
She weighed 9 oz at birth.

On November 24th i started having contractions that were not to intense but very regular. (every four mins.) Due to the holiday commin up the dr's office told me to go to labor and delivery so my Doctor could check me out there. I laid there hooked to machines for a couple hours listening to a chick ABSOLUTELY screaming as she was having her first baby... yikes! They saw on the monitor that i was in fact contracting every four mins. So they gave me a shot a waited to see if they calmed down, and they did. At this point i am asking alot of questions to the nurse and the answers were terribly unpleasant. I was 21 weeks at that point. They said they would not give me meds to stop labor before 30 weeks, and that if i did go into labor they just let nature take its course. She said "even if the baby is born with a heart beat we just let mom hold her till she passes" I thought this nurse was off her rocker... so i made a hasty appointment with my dr who confirmed what she had said. IS THERE ANYTHING MORE BARBARIC? The youngest baby to ever survive was 21 weeks. There are plenty of medications to stop labor even at 21 weeks. SOOOO i am in the market for a new hospital and a more aggressive doctor. I didn't get a diagnosis of pre-term labor yet due to the fact that i am not dilated, but as soon as that happens i need to be at a different hospital, nobody wants a liability. SO i am in need of advice... if you have any let me know.

Husbands and Kids

I pick up Aidan everyday from school and while waiting the 20 mins i either think, read a magazine, or do something else that my two year old didn't allow me to do. That 20 mins becomes my saving grace on some days. Today my thoughts were on my very patient husband and why i am so insecure about him finding someone else or leaving me. It dawned on me that i have always thought that i could never possibly love someone on a comparable level to my kids. Since i have been a mom for 7 years and a wife for 3 i just assumed he would always be next in line but not equal to. It hit me today that not only is it on the same level but it is equally as frightening.

The first time you hold you child some moms like me panic in this completely overwhelmed thought of how the HELL am i going to protect and raise this child. You find yourself wanting to build a perfect padded room in which you prefect child will reside for the rest of its life. I feel that way about jay. Granted it took three years but it hit me, my sudden irrational fear is a fear a mother has for her child, but the problem is he's grown, and he's a cop. He puts himself in harms way on a DAILY basis and unlike a mother i cannot forbid him to cross the road without holding my hand or.... not play with guns.... I fear that God would allow him to be taken from me in a grown up version of cops and robbers and i panic the same way i do when i think about one of my children being taken. Someone once told me that the first year or two are kinda like marriage boot camp and it is NOT pretty! They were right. They also said after that you can't imagine life without them or to go further can't live without them. I am so glad we have reached this place, and i am glad i had my 20 mins to think about why i was being so childish and insecure. The bottom line is we have reached a new and IMPROVED level of love.

Child birth vs root canal

So yesterday after 2 months of dental visits, attempts, and referrals, i finally had my root canal... Did you know that pregnant ladies not only get to pass on the glass of wine but they have to go without the "good stuff" that numbs for long enough to do a root canal? Did you know that i had a horrible experience as a child at a dentist and am now TERRIFIED! Did you know they have come up with a new method to inject you with meds.... they drill a HOLE in your gums into your jaw bone and then inject the root of the tooth with a needle and, for me, the second best stuff....

All i have to say is my husband deserves the husband on the year award. I cried... "shook all my feathers off"Said the dental assistant and forced the dentist to tell me to calm down or he would have to stop for my unborn child's safety.... I'm not a baby about much... but i would rather push a 9 lbs baby out of my vajayjay without drugs...

Today i am bruised and VERY SORE...

and all i got was Tylenol.... : (

Cake and Snot Kendi's 2nd Bday

My sister and Mom...
So Saturday was Kendi's 2nd Birthday. It Was fun.. The pinata only stood up to a couple of hits So Jason and Cory came up with some good ideas... like holding it with their hands...

Look at their faces. Aidan got BOTH of their fingers!!!

They took a break and let Kendi hit it for awhile

Then Aidan hit it out of the park. Look at jay's face... I think he was scared. I may have to wash his shorts for him!

It went well, she acted more like a princess and less like a monkey- See previous posts-

Dancing with Tink

Don't spit on the Cake; Cake and Snot!!!!!!!

Baby update...

Here's whats going on in my belly...

Month 5 - Half Way Home!
Half the pregnancy has now passed, and the baby is about 12 inches long.
The mother has definitely begun to feel movement by now. If a sound is especially startling, the baby may jump in reaction.
Babies are routinely saved when born prematurely at 21 to 22 weeks after fertilization, and in some cases, even younger – babies have lived when born at 19 weeks!

So Baby Hogarth is definitely moving around in there. I can really feel him or her. Aidan can't wait to feel her. I cannot imagine what it would be like to still have two Hogarth's in there. At the last ultrasound i was told he weighs 9 oz...

Desperately seeking baby names....

We cannot come up with ANY names we like.

There's my list : Girl: Ella, Emma, Rachel, Grace

Boy: No idea

His names : "i dunno but i don't like yours"

He only likes Casey for boy or girl. I use to know a Casey (boy) who was stinky and annoying. NO CASEY. So lately i have been coming up with the worst names i can come up with and refer to the baby as such. This weeks is Hogarth (from the movie iron giant)... So i went to the Dr today said i have gallbladder problems so i am on a low salt -for swelling- and low fat -for gallbladder- diet.. yea! But hey maybe i won't gain 100lbs...
BUT Hogarth got a big thumbs up. Afp (test for down syndrome) came back negative YEA!!!! Ultrasound was PERFECT!!! Amniotic fluid perfect. Hogarth has all his or her appropriate working organs.... YEA! Hogarth currently weighs 9oz... Wow! Here are some cute sono pictures.... PLEASE... PLEASE PLEASE give me some names you have heard... We currently need four... A boy first and middle and a girl first and middle...

and it can't be Casey!